Help Needed

Can you unbreak me? I think I'm broken.

OMG it's an update!!!

Mood: Hyper
Music: A Good Thing - Saint Etienne
That's right, I'm updating! A weekend update! Except it's not the weekend....which I guess makes this a weekday update! Not as exciting, but meh. Anyway, what to say...well only like four more weeks of school today! And I need more mint chocolate. Like seriously. I'm having severe withdrawal symptoms.

So I'm a bit alt, I realise this. I mean I'm listening to a band called Saint Etienne for fricks sake. But that's beside the point. Anyway, despite the former belief that I had lots of friends who know me, it's becoming apparent that I really don't. Not many people actually know me well. I guess if you piece together what some people know about me, maybe you'll get the whole picture. Perhaps this is a defensive maneuvre of some sort? Who knows.

So what did I do today. Well I wrote in people's last testaments. Which was fun. More and more as time goes on, I just don't know who I'll actually keep in touch with. I'm feeling very retro/introspective today. So yea, a day for thinking I guess. Things are definitely changing though.

Streams of cynicism

Mood: Relaxed
Music: Champagne For My Real Friends, Real Pain For My Sham Friends - Fall Out Boy

So I haven't written in this in a while. And don't actually have a real topic to write about, so this is just gonna be whatever comes into my head. Just thinking I guess. I really need to do Japanese homework, or English homework, but no. Just can't seem to. I'm hoping that at some point I can sit down and just write my IDS. Hopefully it'll all just come to me. I really put way too much faith into my own ability sometimes.

Hmm, so lately I haven't been connecting with many of my usual friends. For some weird reason, usual topics of conversation just seem ridiculously vapid and superficial. I don't know. It's weird. Either they're changing or I am...probably me. I just feel like there's no real depth there. Living from party to party, good time to good time. I don't know. I think I need to be more focused at this point in my life, and maybe my ambitions and priorities just aren't matching up with theirs anymore. But maybe that's just a part of growing up.

Surprisingly, I don't find drifting as scary or saddening as I thought I would. It's just happening. It's not my fault, or their faults, it's just happening. And maybe it needs to so that we can all move forward with our lives. This is a pivotal turning point I think, I need to move on and grow up.

Uni applications are in, medicine at Adelaide, Melbourne and Monash. Hopefully I'll get an interview at at least one of them. Who knows.

Anyway, think I'm going to sleep soon. Need to be awake for tomorrow, need to be able to absorb information! Tomorrow I will concentrate and get at least one assignment done. Preferably the IDS. We'll see.